I will admit that when I first started working with Apollo, I was intimidated.

I had the conception that this archetype’s energy was so cerebral and intellectual and distant and cold—to the point of being cruel. As though Apollo was too coolly logical to really understand or care much about emotions. I thought I would feel unworthy and invalidated. That scared me away for awhile.

And that intellectual coolness is certainly part of the archetype.

But when I bit the bullet and started working with Apollo, what I found surprised me.

There is another aspect to this archetype.

In the process of working with Apollo, I began to sense what you might call “the god’s presence,” and what I found was an energy that was not withdrawn or cold at all. It was certainly not making me feel stupid or small. It was warm. Like the sun. (Duh, Les. I might have expected that.)

I found Apollo’s energy was uncompromising and demanding, but not in a dominating tyrannical kind of way. It was demanding in a way that was supportive, patient, and persistent.

“No, that’s not it. Try again. Again. Again.”

“Don’t put the work down just because it’s hard. Keep going. Focus. Do it.”

“Get up, Bambi. You MUST get up.” 

Apollo is very good at calling you to your best performance, and pointing out where your thoughts are out of alignment.

That is, he’s good at showing you if you have beliefs that aren’t good for you. He’s good at uncloaking those subconscious negative ideas that are infusing your experiences and making your life feel negative in any way. He was clear with me that there was a kind of wound in my psyche (and in the collective psyche of humanity) stemming from a lack of self worth caused by having unattainable standards, and that these low self worth beliefs were wreaking havoc on my life.

Apollo is all about perfection, and there are certainly aspects of the archetype that feel as though he’s judging you and condemning you for being imperfect—but that’s a lower form of Apollo. The higher form uses perfection as a tool for self development, and for helping people reach the highest, clearest, awesomest versions of themselves. (This post feels so timely with the 2016 Olympics going on. That’s totally the kind of perfection Apollo inspires.)

He blasts sunlight through all the shadows.

I also found that the Apollo energy was very aware of its own “limitations”—which just means that a higher energy of one specific frequency can only help you grow in that one specific way.

Now, expanding yourself in that one specific way will radiate out and have effects through your entire life, but it has still only touched you in that one place. It’s like ripples on the surface of a pond.

For example, let’s say you work with a higher energy like Apollo to open your crown chakra. As you open your crown chakra, you’ll feel those effects in every area of your life—they ripple out to affect every other chakra. But those ripples from your crown chakra don’t fully open your heart chakra. If you want to open your heart chakra, focus on your heart chakra.

That requires working with a different higher energy with a different frequency. In effect, a different god.

Which leads me to Aphrodite.

Again and again when I work with Apollo, coming up with deeper and deeper questions, he directs me toward Aphrodite, as though to say, “This is as far as my guidance can take you. To expand yourself further, you’ll need to turn to Aphrodite.”

This usually happened when Apollo helped me see a negative idea I had that was coloring my entire experience of life. I’d be like, “Oh wow, thanks for pointing that out. That sucks. So . . . what do I do about it?”

And he’d tell me only love could heal it and that wasn’t his area. I had to work with Aphrodite to fix some of the problems Apollo pointed out.

This surprised me for several reasons.

First of all because Apollo is the god of healing. Shouldn’t he be able to handle healing?

And second because the negative beliefs and psychic wounds in question didn’t seem to have anything to do with romance and sex. So why Aphrodite? (Haha, I totally didn’t understand Aphrodite! She is so much more than romance and sex.)

And third because I don’t know of too many myths where Apollo and Aphrodite have that tight of a relationship, or even much interaction with each other. I actually can’t think of one off the top of my head.

But now it makes perfect sense.

Apollo is the god of healing, and he’s good at it. His intellectual logic can help you see your own negative behaviors and ideas, and put a stop to them. His emphasis on perfection extends to physical health.

But when it comes to emotional issues—and there are elements of that to every aspect of healing—he’s not as adept.

One of Apollo’s most famous mottoes is “Know Thyself.”

Aphrodite wants you to Love Thyself. However, you can’t do that if you don’t Know Thyself. So the more deeply you can Know Thyself, the more deeply you can Love Thyself. The connection between these two gods is obvious to me.

I haven’t even really started writing about Aphrodite yet, but just by turning my attention toward her and trying to understand what she’s all about, I can feel my heart expanding by the day.

I feel more able to see where my life does not reflect love. Where I put up with negative situations or people who make me feel less than amazing, and I’m less interested in putting up with that bullshit. Aphrodite wants you to love yourself and to stop putting up with bullshit—both your own bullshit and the bullshit others try to give you. She offers a sense of protection and forgiveness for engaging in that negative behavior in the first place, while simultaneously demanding you knock it off. That’s how she can heal situations that Apollo cannot.

And then there’s the love.

Working with this Aphrodite energy, I feel more than I knew I could feel. I appreciate more than I ever knew I could appreciate—even those negative beliefs that were holding me back, and the bullshit that people try to give me. I love more people than I ever knew I could love.

You know how our hearts generate and radiate these energy fields, and how when we’re in the same room those energy fields are essentially overlapping, or radiating into one another? Well, it’s like I can feel that happening in a palpable sense. (I literally can’t wait to see the baristas at my favorite coffee shops where I write. I think I am creeping them out a little.) I love MYSELF more than I ever knew I could.

What Aphrodite is showing me is that it is all about self love, really. She has shown me very clearly that all love is self love, and all abuse is self abuse.

More and more, I feel less and less alone.

More and more, I feel less and less afraid.

Less afraid to be who I am, to walk and talk my truth even if it’s eccentric. (I had always thought I was a little eccentric, and that I loved myself even so. Turns out I had no idea. Turns out embracing who I really am has me flying higher and higher on my own creative self expression, and trusting that more. (Look at this, I’m writing about channeling ancient Greek gods, for Christ’s sake.) (And I’m using parenthesis inside of other parenthesis, that is so crazy.) And Aphrodite is the goddess of creative self expression as well as of love and sex. That never used to make sense to me, but now it’s perfectly clear. The more deeply you can be yourself and express yourself—as a reflection of your love for yourself—the more you’ll attract amazing people into your life who will love you too.)

More and more, I feel an ecstatic joy bubbling up in me for the mere fact of my existence, for the unique personality I have taken on in this life and all the totems and symbols that come with it. I catch glimpses of “the big picture” (although I’m aware that it’s nowhere near the actual big picture, and is only what my mind is capable of glimpsing at this time) and I feel deeply grateful for even the biggest so-called problems, pains, issues, and fears I’ve dealt with. Why would I be grateful for these negative things? Because it’s clear to me now that they are literally supporting me, even as I’m called to move away from them. It’s clear to me now that everything in my life can ONLY support me. It is clear to me that Aphrodite is one of the first goddesses of creation not only because love and sex is the driving force behind generating creation . . . but because love is really the force that is propping up this whole thing we call “existence.”

I finally understand why Aphrodite is called “The Dancing Goddess” and “The Laughing Goddess.” This happiness is kind of out of the world, you guys.

I’m also listening to a lot more Celine Dion . . . never used to be a big fan.

That is the gift of Aphrodite so far, and I haven’t even written my first articles on her yet.

I’m really looking forward to it though.

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